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john's Journal
20 most recent entries

Date:2005-01-13 08:30
Subject:
Security:Public

http://www.livejournal.com/users/emptyjohn

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Date:2004-07-06 16:09
Subject:
Security:Public

A colleague from a different department just gave me a bottle of faux-champagne as a way of saying thank you for help I’ve given her recently with paperwork. She also invited me to her son’s First Holy Communion. I feigned enthusiasm until I the date was mentioned and then I feigned disappointment, as unfortunately I have no interest in socialising with total strangers. What a nice person.

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Date:2004-07-05 12:05
Subject:Pyrite.
Security:Public

The middle-aged woman who sits across from me likes nothing better than discussing her bodily functions with the other harpies. The four rank syllables of diarrhoea are often on her lips.

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Date:2004-07-05 08:06
Subject:Pyrite.
Security:Public

lj-cut text=click here to read moreCollapse )

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Date:2004-07-03 13:35
Subject:Pyrite.
Security:Public

lj-cut text=click here to read moreCollapse )

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Date:2004-07-02 13:40
Subject:
Security:Public

Recent HistoryCollapse )

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Date:2004-07-02 08:58
Subject:
Security:Public

Since being woken, repeatedly, at still-drunk in the morning by my fiendishly irritating next-door neighbours and bitterly crying myself back to sleep’s less-than-perfect oblivion I have taken to performing my morning exercise regime (two sit-ups, two press-ups, one coughing-fit, three star-jumps and one or two gentle-sobs) whilst bellowing obscenities at the top of my lungs and (wherever possible) smashing two large copper cymbals together. That should teach those happy fuckers.

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Date:2004-07-01 12:10
Subject:The Only Thing Worth Keeping Is Still.
Security:Public

As an antidote to my daily portion of overcooked pasta I have prepared myself a delicious portion of undercooked pasta for lunch. Ah, variety. Tomorrow I might eat it raw.

I can’t seem to find a happy median between conciousness and thoughtless oblivion but I have discovered that I am partial to cheese on toast with Tobasco sauce and black pepper, so it kind of balances out, all in all.

Actually looking forward to a quiet weekend.

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Date:2004-06-30 16:49
Subject:Rushdie, Amis et al.
Security:Public

Fuckholes to metafiction: masturbatory, conceited, catatonic and vain.

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Date:2004-06-30 13:30
Subject:Nothing Succeeds Like Egress.
Security:Public
Mood:Superfluous.

I think I may spend the weekend hidden away at my parents’ house in Potter Bar. I’m seriously thinking about leaving London for a while. Talk is cheap, don't you think?

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Date:2004-06-28 15:34
Subject:Why Kieran Kelly Is Our God.
Security:Public

From a conversation about Al Pacino’s films:

Kieran: The Scent Of A Woman is shit.

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Date:2004-06-28 10:00
Subject:
Security:Public

Someone appears to have swapped my reflection with that of a zombie or other such accursed creature.

In other news it would please me greatly if everyone started to refer to bananas by their official new name: Sweet yellow jungle horns.

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Date:2004-06-28 08:40
Subject:Blandishment.
Security:Public
Mood:Smooshy.

Sweet krist i feel ill. Red wine is debil.

I love you; that's a smashing blouse.

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Date:2004-06-27 13:53
Subject:A Parody Of Introspection: To Be Taken With Much Salt.
Security:Public
Mood:Fine.

the sharp tip of pointless acts of self-destruction.Collapse )
I apologise for this pretentiious crap.
xxx

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Date:2004-06-25 12:08
Subject:
Security:Public

One of my co-workers just said that the reason the age of retirement will rise is because of money wasted on "researching things and going to the moon and that." God bless each and every future tragedy she and her family face, may the sickles be ever sharp. I think I’m still a little drunk. I almost fell over earlier. "Damn wheeléd chair!" *shakes fist at perfidious desk vehicle* "I’ll learn you, I’ll learn you good..." When I am king post-natal abortions* will be commonplace and the sound of my deathsquads will fill the air.

*In fact post-middle age. Or pre-death.

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Date:2004-06-25 09:22
Subject:
Security:Public
Mood:Desprately ill.

Socialising really cuts into my masturbation-and-weeping time.Collapse )

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Date:2004-06-24 08:38
Subject:Contrition Act
Security:Public
Mood:Upbeat

If I owe any of you an apology please take one from below. Thank you.
x

I apologise. - Taken by Emz, re: non-attendance of gig.
I apologise.
I apologise.
I apologise.

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Date:2004-06-23 13:16
Subject:The intrinsic gluttony of adoration.
Security:Public
Mood:Arctic

Yesterday I went to the hospital; it was not fun. Then I listened to music and smoked cigarettes and stared at sky. In the evening I watched Heat and drank a glass of red wine. I hung out with Byron and Kieran Kelly. We ate pasta and tortillas with humus, salad and chilli. I couldn’t sleep for a long time and when I did my dreams were disturbing. Today I sent unnecessarily aggressive e-mails to my stupid co-workers and hated my job most of all. I finished the book I was reading and daydreamt of the remaining wine, the safety of home. This weekend I will avoid spending money. Tomorrow I will drink in the Rochester; anyone who isn’t watching the football would be more than welcome. About 7ish. I am hungry. I adore food.

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Date:2004-06-22 18:04
Subject:The inherent sadness of pillarboxes.
Security:Public
Mood: quixotic

There's a new Cranes album out. For anyone who cares:

https://sgi16.netservers.net/cranes-fan.com/cranesorder.cgi?config=/virtualhosts/cranes-fan.com/ssl/mailorder/config.txt

I've listened to "Maps" by Yeah Yeah Yeahs on repeat for about two hours now...

xxxxzzxzzzzzz

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Date:2004-06-22 08:23
Subject:Wine: it's closer to win than lose. Or something.
Security:Public

Today's catchphrase is: "Salvation wont save us now."

I have a wicked bad hangover. Last night I got drunk and listened to music with Mr Andrew Knifton. I have vague memories of pesto and pasta and Ice Motherfucking Cream, bitch and Rocky and Tricky and wine, vast oceans of wine. I had a damn good time. But now I feel like death. I had mashed potato with onion, parsnip and rosemary for breakfast. But now I feel like death...

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